The Book Club

My Top 10 Books for Writers

10. Twilight by Stephenie Meyer

At this point, a lot of you have just written off this list as being ridiculous.

But stick with me: Twilight, the book much reviled by literary types and even the common man for its abhorrent prose and mind-numbing plot (not to mention the gender issues), is also one of the bestselling books out there currently. Sure, it has a little to do with the movies, but the books were popular long before Kristen Stewart started staring out windows for long periods of time.

Twilight is important because editors keep trying to repeat its success in the marketplace. There are plenty of Twilight clones out there. Some of them are even worse than Meyer's books. But the thing here to realize is that people like it. A lot. And as a writer, if you want to be published, this is something you need to recognize. Being good isn't enough. You have to be sellable.

9. 13 Ways of Looking at the Novel by Jane Smiley

Unlike Meyer, Smiley is an acknowledged master of fiction writing. And in this wonderful exploration of the novel, Smiley blends two important things for writers: knowledge from her own writing life and knowledge taken from literary criticism.

Reading is the most important thing a writer can do, and we often forget that. Smiley blends the two here in a way that should make sense to you as a writer and will probably open new doors of thinking. This book is especially good for those of you writers who never took a college English class. Learning the art of enjoying a book and analyzing it at the same time is an important one if you want to be a success. Smiley also gives some great personal anecdotes about her life as a published writer, which should dispel any dreams of Rowling-like riches for most of us.

8. The Harry Potter Series by JK Rowling

If I'm suggesting you read Twilight to see why something so poorly written is still publishable and popular, then I should also suggest something that is both well-written and immensely popular.

The Harry Potter series by Rowling is simply the most important book series out there. When discussing literature in my classes, I often point out that to become literature, books must last and still be read for a long period of time, even after their authors are gone. And the only books we can reasonably assume will remain in existence is the Harry Potter series.

There's a lot to learn from Rowling, especially her ability to create characters, even minor, background characters, that are incredibly unique and charming. Also, learn from Rowling how to create complex evil - Dolores Umbridge is perhaps one of the greatest villains ever created, and she's not even the series' main antagonist.

7. Reading Like a Writer by Francine Prose

As I mentioned above, writers often forget that half of writing is reading.

The way the human brain deals with language is something that scientists haven't been able to figure yet out, because it's just so damn complicated. But know this: you absorb words and language like osmosis through reading, just like you absorb music. You can sing back a little melody and then slightly alter it from your favorite radio hit, the same way you can absorb the words of Flaubert, Woolf, and Salinger (which Prose all takes a look at here). Then you can use them in your own work.

Learning to absorb and use those words and sentence constructions is one of the most basic but important writing tasks. And one we as writers often avoid.

6. On Writing by Stephen King

This is book is half-way between a memoir of King's life and his take on writing and publishing. In the book, he details what works for him and why it works that way. He details the pitfalls of his own career (and those of the fellow writers in his family, namely his wife). And in the end, you get a beautiful picture of just what the life of a writer is like.

King's advice for actual writing in this book isn't much. He spends more time on the practical side of a writing life and being a working writer. This is another lesson that I think most writers miss out on and need to hear more of. Author Q&As are always about how to write and where do you get your inspiration, but that's not most writers' problems. It's more often how to live with writing that is the problem. If you're a writer, then write. It's the other stuff that's hard.

5. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

To be honest, it was either this book for this spot, or Wuthering Heights or Jane Eyre. That should tell you a little something about what I'm going for here.

The whole point of this entry in this list is that you take a great novel, even one you've read, and you just destroy it. You re-read it multiple times close together. You look for every symbol, every twist of a phrase, every unreliable narrator, and you just tear it apart in your mind. Live and breathe that book for a couple of months until you can talk in that author's voice.

I finally settled on The Great Gatsby because it's a fairly simple read on the surface with so much lying underneath. And that's what's makes a great book.

4. 20 Master Plots: And How to Build Them by Ron Tobias

If you read our sister site the Writing Workshop, then you know that I publish Writing Prompts at least once a week. But this book is basically the perfect writing prompt.

There are schools of literary criticism that believe that all plots can be summed up in just 3 or 10 or 100 types. This book takes 20 of the most common plot forms, describes them, gives examples, and breaks them apart. You get both the literary criticism side of the bargain in the analysis and a blueprint for how to create your own stories.

One summer while getting my Master of Professional Writing degree, I went through each of the plots and created a short story. It was hard work, because many of the plots weren't my cup of tea and I was forcing myself to be very creative in a short time span, by creating that many characters to go with the plots. But it was like a great exercise bootcamp - I came out on the other end a tougher, meaner writer.

3. Publishing for Profit: Successful Bottom-Line Management for Book Publishers by Thomas Woll

It aggravates me to no end when writers say they want to be published, and then have absolutely no idea how the modern publishing industry works. This book is a great starting place for throwing away your preconceptions and romantic ideals of how the New York City publishing world actually functions. There's great advice in this book, as well, if you want to self-publish, which is becoming a more and more popular form of publishing.

In general, publishing is a business, and that's the way writers have to view it when it's time to publish. When you're writing, you've got to be creative. But after that happens, all the other stuff needs to be from a business perspective, because that's how your agent, editor, and bookseller are going to see it. Sure, they're going to love your prose, but at the end of the day, they also need to make money or they don't get to play with books anymore. Understand that, realize it doesn't make them bad people, and everybody will be much happier at the end of the day.

2. The Paris Review Interviews

The Paris Review Interviews are a selection of four books that are simply the best writer interviews I've ever read. The interviews cover a wide range of time, genres, and lifestyles, and to be honest, you learn more about writing life and writing style here than you would anywhere else. With it's down to earth tone and style, the interviews feel like a collected version of several reading Q&As that went exceptionally well.

Learning from the best is really what it is all about, but there's also this great feeling of inspiration that I love from these interviews. For the most part, you get masters talking about their fears, which humbles you, and talking about their triumphs, which makes you want to share in their glory. Being a writer can often feel like a lonely business, and this book just reminds you how much you share with others like you.

1. The Chicago Manual of Style, 16th Edition

If you didn't know, The Chicago Manual of Style is what publishers use to create their books. Every one of the Big Six publishers use it, and so do the majority of the smaller houses. Most literary journals use the Manual. So do a lot of professional blogs.

In other words, if you're a writer and you don't know this book cover-to-cover and inside out, then you're doing yourself a disservice. And I'll be completely honest here: agents will reject a manuscript for being messy. Even if it looks like there might a diamond in the rough underneath all the grammar mistakes. The agents and editors simply don't have time to fix it for you.

Learn your grammar. Learn the style the publishers use. You'll get ahead in publishing that way. This is your writing bible. Use it. Love it. Revere it. And avoid those comma splices.

Top 10 Fantasy Series for Non-Fantasy Readers

My roommate, who majored in creative writing and literature with me, doesn't read fantasy. I read a lot of fantasy. Therefore, I've created this nifty list for people who want to try fantasy, to show the how they can join the party. Remember, all that's needed to enjoy fantasy is a good dose of some willing suspension of disbelief.

10. The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien, part of the Middle Earth collection and prologue to The Lord of the Rings series

There's a reason why I didn't go with the more well-known Lord of the Rings trilogy. And that's mostly because that trilogy has some major writing issues and could easily dissuade even the most adventurous reader from reading. Lord of the Rings sets up the whole fantasy genre, but it also startsmany of its failings. So, better to start our list with Tolkien's other (but still connected to his Middle Earth mythology) masterpiece: The Hobbit.

Telling the story of the small but fiery Bilbo Baggins and his adventures in fighting a dragon with a horde of dwarves and the powerful wizard Gandalf (yep, the same character portrayed by Sir Ian McKellen in the movies), The Hobbit is a great standalone novel that is fun, upbeat, and has lots of crazy action. We also get to met one of the great villains of all fantasy: the insane and possessed Golllum. If you like this book, then go on to read the trilogy or one of Tolkien's other standalone books, like The Silmarrillion.

9. Rhapsody by Elizabeth Haydon, the first book in The Symphony of Ages

This one is probably the most recent great addition to the high fantasy genre. Rhapsody, a beautiful girl with the gift of music, runs away from her family, only to end up on the streets. After a chance encounter with a giant warrior beast and his ninja-like (and quite ugly) friend, Rhaspody travels across the world and through time, only to emerge a warrior woman in her own right.

As part of a currently six books series,Rhapsody fits the mold of some of the great fantasy series out there, but Haydon does an amazing job grafting new ideas onto the sometimes stale genre tale of the hero's quest. This is the one on the list for any music or epic romance lovers. As a classically-trained musician myself, I fell instantly in love with Rhaspody and her tale of cross-time love with a handsome and emotionally scarred prince (who just happens to be a bit of a dragon himself).

8. Guilty Pleasuresby Laurell K. Hamilton, first book in the Anita Blake series

This long-running series has been considered the pinnacle of achievement for genre-blending. The Anita Blake series has combined fantasy elements, detective and mystery elements, and erotica to create one of the bestselling fantasy series of all times. Unfortunately, it's low on this list because the books' quality wavers over time.

However, that's not to say that the first ten or so books in the series are not amazing and shouldn't be read. And most people who get that far often end up reading the rest due to their love of vampire-hunter and vampire-lover Anita, her former werewolf love Richard, and her current beau, master vampire Jean-Claude. If you're a mystery or romance person, this might be the best stepping stone into a well-developed fantasy world.

7. The Mists of Avalonby Marion Zimmer Bradley, part of the Avalon series written with Diana L. Paxson

If you want to do a dissertation on the origins of the modern fantasy genre, you're going to have start with mythology. And there's nowhere mythology has been remade and rewritten more often than the stories of King Arthur and his knights.

But Bradley's The Mists of Avalon is simply the best modern translation of the well-known stories I've ever come across. While paying homage to the original tales and several of the important rewrites, Bradley puts her focus on the female characters: Guinivere, Morgan le Fay, and the Lady of the Lake. By doing so, she creates one of the most compelling and original fantasy stories I've ever read. So it's not surprising that Bradley and her protege Paxson continued the series in several more books. But this one is the classic, so start here.

6. Dragon Princeby Melanie Rawn, first book of the Dragon Prince and Dragon Star series

I've been re-reading these lately, as I read them the first time sometime during high school. You can find my review of Dragon Prince here and my Character Analysis of the main character Pandsala here.

And the reason I've been rereading it is that it's really good. If you're a fan of Game of Thrones on HBO or any other good, drama-filled period piece, where the action is all intrigue and a bit of violence, then Dragon Prince is a good place to go for a crash course in magic and dragons. It's mostly about princes and princesses, all set-up with a great world and some unique magic power systems that are some of the best I've ever seen. Combine that with a hefty dose of romance, and you've got yourself one of the most compelling fantasy series out there.

5. Kushiel's Dartby Jacqueline Carey, first in the Phedre no Delaunay trilogy and first part of the Kushiel and Naamah series

Set up in an alternate France wherein a group of angels descended to Earth and created a race of beautiful people who worship the power of love above all else, the Kushiel series is a masterwork of romance, erotica, globe-hopping adventure, and spy intrigue. Its amazingly complex world is mirrored in kind only by its insanely original central character of Phedre no Delaunay, a master courtesan-spy.

This is where to go if you want to a little more reality grounding in your fantasy, or you really like medieval or ancient history. Carey explores the ideas of angels and other magics, along with a bravado towards sex writing that has to be read to be understood. Hands down, Carey's magic is her ability to make words sexy as hell.

4. Storm Front by Jim Butcher, first book of The Dresden Files series

The Harry Dresden series, made into both a TV show and a comic book series, is simply lots of fun. If you're a mystery fan, then Harry Dresden, a wizard PI, should be your first foray into fantasy.

Dresden, like Phedre, is a masterwork of a character. He's got some black in his soul, has a weakness for helping women even when he shouldn't, and manages some hilarious acts of wizardry. He once even rode around on Field Musuem's T-Rex Sue. Also, if you're a fan of Chicago, where the series is set, or feel like that maybe fantasy isn't grounded enough in the real world for you, then this will give you a modern day look, without all the Twilight angst, at what magic could be like in the real world. It's got a Buffy-feel, wherein the magic is almost secondary to the characters and mystery.

3. Pawn of Prophecyby David Eddings, first book in the Belgariad and Mallorean series

For a ten book series, and as one of the cornerstones of the fantasy genre, Pawn of Prophecy is quite easy to read. You'll tear through all of the books at a fast clip, bringing with you lots of great world-building, creative uses of magic, and a whole band of great characters.

If you're looking for some great high fantasy female characters, who often get the short end of the stick, The Belgariad is also a great place to go. Polgara, Ce'Nedra, and Velvet are all fully developed women, who often outpace their male counterparts in terms of power and action. While still pulling on the classic Lord of the Rings vibe but adding a more modern touch, Eddings manages to create a great hero quest story without the stodgy (and boring) parts of some of the older fantasy classics.

2. Dead Until Darkby Charlaine Harris, the first in the Sookie Stackhouse/ True Blood/ Southern Vampire Mysteries series

A lot of people watch HBO's True Blood, but not as many people read the series on which it is based. If you're one of those, then the Sookie Stackhouse books are a good place to start your fantasy reading. Like The Dresden Files, Sookie's world is the present day, with the only exception being that vampires are semi-commonplace.

The joy of this series is that it's simply a fast-paced beach read tinged with a bit of magic and mystery. There's nothing truly great about the writing. Some of the characters aren't really fleshed out and act more plot devices than people. But in the end, if you start, you'll probably read the whole series. They're fun, easy-to-read, and you don't have to think too hard to really get into it.

1. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stoneby JK Rowling, first book in the Harry Potter series

Frankly, why would you start anywhere else if you're going to read fantasy? Most people who have read the Harry Potter series wouldn't really consider themselves fantasy fans. Most of them don't even really like to read. Harry Potter is a whole social, cultural, and media empire, not just books. Which makes it the perfect stepping stone into the fantasy genre - because it does use nearly fantasy genre trick in the books and then some.

Rowling has created a true masterpiece, although not without faults - no masterpiece doesn't have a few of those - and Harry Potter should really just be a gateway drug into all the other great fantasy out there. The only problem is that people have gone from Harry Potter to Twilight and that's really not going to help, because while Harry Potter does have great writing, Twilight's writing is particularly awful and conforms to all the worst stereotypes of the fantasy genre. So, instead of going there, pick one of the others on this list. And have at.

Just be careful - you might find yourself addicted to the fantasy genre, too.

Top 10 Books to Start a New Genre

Whenever I tell people what I do for a living, I always get asked the same question: what book do I recommend for them to read? Instead of just a straight Top 10 list of the books I most frequently recommend, I thought I'd split them up by genre - picking one each for the most popular genres on the market right now.

 
10. High Literature/Classics: The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

I recommend The Great Gatsby to any reader who is ready for a challenge. I do this mostly because it is pretty easy to read and has a plot that clips along at a decent pace. The Great Gatsby's brilliance, though, is based on how layered it is - the more you think about the book, the more questions you ask (like Is Nick a reliable narrator?), and the better the book becomes. It's a great place, therefore, to begin a journey into highbrow literature and the classics.

 
9. Horror: Pride and Prejudice and Zombiesby Jane Austen and Seth Grahme-Smith

If you're going to start in on horror, I say start simply. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is a perfect mixture of romance, satire, and humor, along with some great horror scenes. Sure, it's not the scariest book on the market (go read It for that), but it is a nice stepping stone to see if you like the genre at all. And, to be completely honest, I'm in the middle of it right now, so I might be a bit biased, but I am thoroughly enjoying it.

 
8. Thriller: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson

If you're starting in on a new genre, it's best to go with a book that you can ask others about if you get lost or if you simply need encouragement to finish it. Millions of people think the Millennium series is one of the best series out there right now, so I'm sure you can find a friend who will read it with you.

Also, it's not James Patterson, so it does have that going for it.

 
7. Urban Fantasy/Detective Stories - The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher

One of the most popular genres on TV, in movies, and in books right now, urban fantasy basically covers anything fantastical set in the modern day. And The Dresden Files is my favorite series of them all. Forget Anita Blake and Sookie Stackhouse; it's all about Harry Dresden. It might be because I'm a guy, but this series (12 books and counting) combines the best aspects of both genres with a solid detective story and it's quality never wavers (unlike Anita and Sookie). Start with Storm Front and I promise, you won't be disappointed.

 
6. Superhero Comics: Avengers Academy by Christos Gage and Mike McKone

It's hard for me to suggest a comic book to new readers of the superhero genre, because part of what I love about comics is their long history. Many of the DC and Marvel characters have been in continual publication for forty or more years. But for me, the place to go to right now is Avengers Academy, which focuses on some of the lesser known Avengers and their newest trainees, eliminating the need for knowing all that backstory.

It's got teenage drama alongside real issues and one major secret: these kids aren't the next superheroes - they're the superpowered kids most likely to end up as supervillains. It's a great premise and with the way Gage handles the characters, it's easy to jump in on. Plus, the older Avengers gives the reader a taste of the rest of the Marvel Universe, if they want to explore other titles.

 
5. Mystery: One for the Money by Janet Evanovich

Why Evanovich? Mostly because I love her interviews. The author knows exactly what kind of books she writes, knows her market better than her publisher, and nails it 9 times out of 10. And she's got a great sense of humor. Now, I admit, this isn't a book I've read. I just don't read mystery books that often. But this is the mystery book that my friends recommend to me. So, we'll just have to trust them for now. I'll let you know what I think in a few months, as the book is currently sitting on my own desk, in the To Read Pile. (See, I take my own advice!)

4. Romance: Birthright by Nora Roberts

Romance is one of the largest and most popular genres out there. In fact, Harlequin, the world's largest romance publisher, has at times managed to be quite lucrative when other publishers flail. But sadly, I don't read romance, either. So this one is coming straight to you from my mother and the internet.

You can't really go wrong with Nora Roberts, as she's written over a hundred romance books. Yes, you heard that right. You can't write that many books and get them published, if you aren't doing something right. And looking over several Top 10 romance lists and lists of the best of Nora Roberts, I've got to go with Birthright, which even has some action, murder, and violence! Sadly, no, I still won't be giving this one a shot. (I just can't do romance. I'm sorry.)

 
3. Beach Reads: Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult

By saying Beach Reads, I am definitely not insinuating that Nineteen Minutes is not a work of quality. Instead, this is one of those books that you can find everywhere - Target, the airport, I've even seen it at the grocery store! Basically, it's one of those books that you pick up when you've got a chance and want to relax into the book. That's a beach read, and nobody has done that genre better than Picoult in recent years. She's basically the smart and talented version of Nicolas Sparks, though that's not saying much.

 
2. High Fantasy: Pawn of Prophecy (Belgariad Book 1) by David Eddings

When you talk about high fantasy, most people instantly think Lord of the Rings. And while those are great books, if you're not a high fantasy fan, Lord of the Rings is not going to make you one, as they're really hard to read. Pawn of the Prophecy is fun and breezy by comparison, and manages not to have those misogynist overtones. Frankly, if you're thinking about Lord of the Rings, bypass it and go here instead.

 
1. Non-Superhero Comics: Fables by Bill Willingham

Seriously, I get asked more about non-superhero comic recommendations than anything else, and I simply can't stress this enough - Fables is the place to go. If you think comic books are all about tights, then let this comic dissuade you of that fact. If you think comic books are for kids, this is also the place to go. Fables is one of the smartest and most creative things I've ever read, and if you're looking to branch out of your comfort zone, this is the place to do it.

Top 10 Star-Crossed Lovers

Who doesn't love some star-crossed lovers? I mean, sure, romantic entanglement is fine and dandy, but it doesn't really get exciting until you throw in a dead priest, poison, ghosts, alter egos, mad women in the attic, and a heroic sacrifice to save the universe.

So to all the craziest of love stories, here's my Top 10 Star-Crossed Lovers:

10. Shadowcat (Kitty Pryde) & Colossus (Peter Rasputin) - Astonishing X-Men

Sure, she was the youngest X-Man and Wolverine's sidekick and he was the big, silent Russian who stole her teenage heart. Too bad he cheated on her, she got injured, he died but was reborn without telling her, she started dating a sassy Englishman, he beat up said sassy Englishman, and then, he actually died, saving the world from a virus that had claimed the life of his sister.

Kitty and Colossus are one of two X-Men couples on this list, but it's not until Joss Whedon's run on Astonishing X-Men that made them break into the Top 10. The moment that clinched it was where Kitty discovers that Peter is alive, and she screams at him that if he's a fake, a clone, or an shapeshifter, she's gonna kill him. That's love.

 
9. Catherine & Heathcliff - Wuthering Heights

Sure, they both commit acts of utter horror over the course of the book, but there's no doubting that they loved each other. Catherine even manages to torture Heathcliff as a ghost from beyond the grave. Her decision to marry his enemy, and the resulting revenge he inflicts upon their children, speaks of their wild love and their mutual sadistic insanity. It's enough to be #9.

 
8. Perrin Aybara & Faile Bashere - The Wheel of Time

He was a blacksmith cast into the role of a general, while she was a noblewoman who ran away from her duties for adventure. Her brashness captured his heart, but it's not until she's captured by an opposing army and reduced to a slave does Perrin's love for his wife come out. He resists the temptations of the most beautiful woman in the world to use their combined armies to smash his enemies and free his wife. That devotion, even when their world might be ending, earns them the number 8 spot - as well as being the most stable couple of The Wheel of Time series.

 
7. Harry Dresden & Karrin Murphy - The Dresden Files

Sure, it's taken them twelve books to finally realize that they might even sorta maybe like each other, but it's been pretty obvious from the get-go that Chicago cop Karrin Murphy and wizard-for-hire Harry Dresden were made for each other. They've battled vampires, faires, and fallen angels together, and unlike most couples, aren't afraid to admit when they want to kill each other. If they had sealed the deal, they probably would have earned a higher number. Read more about Murphy at her Character Analysis.

 
6. Thom Creed & Goran - Hero

Thom's the gay son of a superhero just figuring out how to be both gay and superhero. Goran is his basketball buddy and only friend - up until Goran finds out that Thom's gay. What Thom doesn't know is that Goran's got secrets of his own. The only couple from a Young Adult novel on this list, I put them here because their miscommunications and secrets are what make this book interesting, a better read than most, and totally deserving of the #6 spot.

 
5. Starfire (Koriand'r) and Nightwing (Dick Grayson) - The New Teen Titans

He's the first Robin and the current Batman. She's the hot alien who doesn't wear a lot of clothes and can flash-fry a whole town. But when they were teens, these two developed one of the most long-lasting and loving relationship of any of their peers and even made it to the altar  - until their demon-possessed friend killed the priest, that is. While they're not currently together (he's too busy brooding, she's off in space), you know it's just a matter of time before they realize they were meant to be.

 
4. Jane Eyre & Mr. Rochester - Jane Eyre

Her life as an English governess and orphan sucked. His wife's crazy and hidden in the attic. It's only when their lives suck even worse do they realize that being together might make their lives just a little bit better. The power of love, baby.

 
3. Cyclops (Scott Summers) & Phoenix (Jean Grey) - X-Men: The Dark Phoenix Saga

They loved each from when they were fighting evil as teens, but it wasn't until bad boy Wolverine showed up and tried to take Jean's affection did things get real. She got possessed by an all-powerful galactic entity who couldn't handle human emotions and destroyed a solar system, so she sacrificed herself to save the universe, but not before declaring her love for her man.

Luckily, this is comics and she got better (and also replaced by a clone of her that he married and had a kid with but it's best not to dwell). They were married in front of their friends and were even happy for some time, before they cheated on each other and she died and ascended to another realm. I'm choosing to remember the good times and placing the emphasis on "star-crossed" for this one to earn the number 3 spot.

 
2. Phedre no Delaunay & Joscelin Verreuil -  Kushiel's Dart

To the world, Phedre was the foremost courtesan. In reality, she was a spy. And Joscelin was her warrior priest protector, chosen specifically for his virtue and deadly skill. Of course, what's better than that? Oh, right - being captured by Vikings and tortured nearly to death. From their many adventures, including saving and adopting the future king, it's Phedre and Joscelin's devotion to each other, even given his tortured virtue and her being a courtesan spy, that earn them the number 2 spot.

 
1. Romeo & Juliet - Romeo and Juliet

This list would be invalid if these two weren't number 1.

Top 10 Mothers from Fantasy & Comic Book Series

Comic books and high fantasy novels are traditionally considered a "boy's realm", with lots of violence, he-men type antics, and overblown cliches. Luckily, in the past twenty years or so, fantasy and comic books caught onto the reality that these overgrown boys love their mothers, too, and have given us some of the best mother figures out there.

 
10. Invisible Woman (Sue Richards) from Marvel Comic's Fantastic Four

Sure, Sue can turn herself invisible and create invisible barriers, but her real power is as the backbone and mother-figure of the Fantastic Four team, which consists of her, her husband, her brother, and her best friend. But, truly, Sue's potential wasn't reached until she gave birth to two of the universe's most powerful players. That's right people - her son Franklin can change reality at whim (once, going so far as to create an entire other planet to save his parents' lives - no joke) and her daughter Valeria has hyper-intelligence, meaning she's way smarter than pretty much everyone. And yet, somehow, Sue still manages to save the world at least once a month. Score one for multi-tasking soccer moms.

 
9. Esme Cullen (portrayed in film by Elizabeth Reaser) from Twilight

Sure, I may hate Twilight, especially the Mary Sue-like qualities of the majority of the characters, but I can't fault Esme. She is, in fact, my favorite Twilight character (though that's not saying much). Esme, who killed herself but was saved by her eventual husband after losing her son in childbirth, can't have children - so she's dedicated her immortal life to her six adopted children. Now that's devotion. And kudos for the film's producers for allowing Esme to join in the fighting, which she doesn't do in the books. Mothers can kick butt, too, as we'll see later on in this list.

 
8. Rhapsody from Symphony of Ages

Rhapsody is the classic model of the redemptive mother - she runs away from her own loving family to pursue foolish dreams, and it's only in becoming a mother herself, over and over again, that she finally becomes the heroine she was born to be. Rhapsody adopts children and kingdoms throughout this six book series, and while not all of them have happy fates, she does finally find happiness when she gives birth to her own son and fights to protect him from a harsh world that wants them both dead. In fact, she inflicts more violence on others in her maternal ways than her dragon-born husband. Bonus points for a mother armed with a sword.

7. Mary Jane Watson-Parker from Marvel Comic's Spider-Girl

Mary Jane, as she's better known to most readers (and movie-watchers as Kirsten Dunst), in this popular and rather long-lived alternate future tale never lost her child May Parker. Instead, May grew up to embody both of her parents - Peter's drive for responsibility and Mary Jane's love of life and friends. Mrs. Parker might not have her husband, daughter, or infant son's super-powers (little Benjy can already climb walls - be glad he's not your child), but she's not above fighting back when her family's in danger.

 
7. Sioned from the Dragon Prince/Dragon Star series

Sioned was just a sunrunner witch until she met and fell in love with Rohan, a minor king. Together, they overthrew the evil High King and his eldest daughter. But Sioned's act as a mother has little to do with her ruling as Queen. Instead, it comes from the fact that she raised the next High King - Pol, Rohan's son by that evil High King's eldest daughter who raped/manipulated her husband. Sioned took the child, rescued her husband, and probably killed Pol's mother in a blaze of glory. She then spent the rest of her life protecting, fostering, and raising a son she knew wasn't hers.

 
6. Martha Kent from DC Comic's Superman

Martha Kent may not have superpowers, but her adopted son from Krypton sure does. In DC Comic lore, Martha is not only a good mother, she's the greatest mother ever - she managed to instill in the most powerful being on Earth a potent morality, and that he must do be the one to save the world. Ma Kent gave Superman everything he needed as a child: love, compassion, and a normal childhood, and in turn, Superman saved the world hundreds of times over. Now that is good parenting.

 
4. Phedre no Delaunay from Kushiel's Dart

Phedre is not your typical mother - she is, in fact, a courtesan and spy. But for her adopted son Imriel, Phedre traveled the world twice over to save him and risked her life for him more times than she could count. Phedre even defied the crown, Queen Ysandre, Imriel's aunt and Phedre's best friend, to keep Imriel with her. In the end, Phedre made sure that Imriel became one of her land's best rulers.

 
3. Polgara from the Belgariad and Malloreon

Polgara, like Esme, is an immortal. And for her long life, she has lived without true love, raising and protecting the descendents of her long dead sister. Polgara had been mother to generation upon generation of children, facing danger at every turn, in order to protect the coming savior of their world. She literally gave up her own life, for an eternity, for her wards. That's motherly love, people, in a nutshell.

 
2. Aunt May from Marvel Comic's Spider-Man

Like many women on this list, May's motherly love isn't for her own child, but rather, her ward: in this case, her nephew Peter Parker, better known as Spider-Man. So why does May deserve the number two spot?

Because's she's a badass, that's why. Aunt May can kick Martha Kent's butt any day of the week. And she doesn't have a cushy life - she's a down and out woman of the world who goes about her day with love and devotion and isn't afraid of calling Peter out when he's being stupid (which is often). You better believe that if she's coming at you with an umbrella, you better run the other direction.

 
1. Molly Weasley from Harry Potter

"NOT MY DAUGHTER, YOU BITCH!" Nuff said.

Top 10 Books/Series I Just Couldn't Finish

Since I work in publishing and have a master's degree in professional writing, let's just say that I've had to read a lot of different things, many of them that I have actively hated. I have this thing where I normally finish every book I start, but sometimes, very rarely, I just can't freakin' do it.

10. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season Eight - Joss Whedon, Georges Jeanty

I really, really wanted to love this comic book series. I mean, c'mon, I had cried my eyes out when Buffy went off the air and Sunnydale was turned into a giant hole in the ground. And then it's turned into a comic book series written by Joss Whedon himself? Could this get any better?

Sadly, yes. It definitely could. From storylines that just didn't make any sense (Angel wants to kill Buffy, but he's still good? Dawn is a giant, hooks up with Xander five seconds after his new girlfriend dies? Willow cheats on Kennedy? Buffy goes lesbian for five seconds?) to the art of Jeanty which I just didn't like (love the covers by Jo Chen, though - she rocks), this series just stunk. I try not to think of it when I fondly remember TV Buffy.

9. The Rainbow - D. H. Lawrence

I was supposed to read this in some literature class, junior year of college. I loved every single book in that class - tore through them even though I was taking 20 credit units, was working two part-time jobs, and was playing in three ensembles (There were 60 hours of the week  my butt had to be in a chair somewhere - and that was before practice and homework.)

But The Rainbow? I didn't even get through the first fifty pages before I gave up. I don't remember exactly what it was, but man, I was bored. That I remember. Maybe I'll try again one of these days.

 
8. The Sword of Shannara - Terry Brooks

No, listen. I know I'm a huge fan of epic fantasy, and that this series is one of the greatest of all time, apparently. But, man, I don't think I've ever been so bored reading a fantasy novel. Normally, I get done with one book in the series and jump right into the next one, because I've already gone out and bought it, so it's ready to go - I simply can't help myself.

I could help myself here. I just felt like this book, the first book in the series, was so boringly obvious. I just couldn't get passed the generic feel of it, that it was just another Tolkien re-do (trust me, I'm not the hugest fan of Tolkien, either), so that I've never read another Shannara book. I've read other Brooks books, and I love them, but no Shannara. I know people say the books get better, but if you get bored through the first one, doesn't that say something rather obvious?

7. The Canterbury Tales - Geoffrey Chaucer

So, another English classic, and another story I just couldn't get all the way through. I think, by now, I've read each tale individually at some point or another, and I do rather enjoy The Wife of Bath's tale, but overall, I just can't take it. I don't know if it's the Medieval English (I do believe that reading it in modern English is cheating a bit, yes?) or if it's just too long, but I just couldn't do it. I guess I've never been good with that many footnotes.

 
6. Dracula - Bram Stoker

I love vampire books, too (well, except for that other vampire book series on this list), so why couldn't get through their great-granddaddy? Well, most literary scholars will tell you that Dracula just isn't written very well. It exists in its current form today, mostly because it was so sensational then and got such a lift from the movies that there based on it during Hollywood's golden age. In other books, it's not really even a good book. Apparently, I agreed.

 
5. Wonder Woman - Anyone

Wonder Woman has a problem. Essentially, as the third member of the DC Comics triumverate of Superman-Batman-Wonder Woman, nobody can make Wonder Woman, the beautiful Amazon princess Diana, as popular as the boys. And though I want to love her solo series, because I think she's a great character, well, I've got to agree. Wonder Woman, though I've tried several times, just never works 100% for me.

I know it can't be the tiara and bullet-bouncing bracelets, though. Those are pretty cool. Honorable mentions, though, go to Greg Rucka and Gail Simone, who wrote the best Wonder Woman stories in recent memory. Thanks for trying guys.

 
4. Le Morte D'Arthur - Sir Thomas Malory

The third English classic on our list and yet another of Middle English coming to kick my ass. Frankly, just like I love vampires and high fantasy, I love Arthur stories and myth tales. So, I should totally love this, right? Too bad it took me nearly five years to read, in stops and starts. So, yes, I did technically finish this one. But five years? Really? It deserves a place on this list, because I basically only finished it because I forced myself through it.

 
3. For Whom the Bell Tolls - Ernest Hemingway

I hated every moment of this book. Especially because the year before, my work had been described by not one, but two of my graduate instructors as Hemingway-esque. They thought I was a huge fan or something, when I hadn't read a single page of his work. (That happens, sometimes. Don't assume English majors actually read all the classics.)

So when I finally read Hemingway, I realized I just couldn't stand his work. Maybe it was because it was similiar to mine in a way, but it really could be the fact that Hemingway's characters were all so 1-dimensional that I just couldn't take it. Urgh. Even thinking about this book makes me sad, especially since people think I write like him.

 
2. Twilight - Stephenie Meyer

So, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't rip on anything I hadn't read. So I read Twilight earlier this year. And it basically confirmed everything I already had guessed - Stephenie Meyer can't write. And Bella Swan has single-handedly set back women in literature one hundred years. And, oh, people, really - Edward Cullen is a pedophile. I mean, really. Swan's sixteen when they meet. Cullen is one hundred and some change. Pedophile. Gross.

But, because of my annoyances with a plot that doesn't hold together and a central love story that, well, disgusts me (mostly due to it's violent and co-dependent nature that is completely unhealthy and yet sold to young girls as true love), I couldn't read the other 3 books in the series. And I won't ever. I'll go watch the movies, instead, for a few hours of unintentional humor.

 
 1. Love in the Time of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

When this book is discussed, I tend to make a face and excuse myself from the conversation. My thoughts on this book might not be rational, but it's true - I really kind of hate it. I don't know if it's those sentences that last for three pages, or the fact that the book moves at such a glacial pace that it makes me want to pull my hair out, but I just hate it.

No offense to those who love it (because there are those that do), but man, this was one book that I was stranded on a desert island with, I still wouldn't finish it.

 

So, what are the books you couldn't finish? Or are you one of those readers who just never finishes anything? (I don't know how you do it.)

Top 10: Books I Haven't Read Yet

Since we're at the end of the year, there's a bunch of Top 10 lists of the Best Books of the Year coming out - you can head over to the Writing Workshop for three of them. So, in honor of that, I am starting a new Book Club feature: The Top 10! First up, the books I wanted to read this year, and haven't.

#10. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies - Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

I bought this book a while ago, despite my general non-love for zombies and a certain apathy for Jane Austen (she's great, sometimes, but only when you're in the mood). But, it did start off a whole new publishing crazy trend, and I figured if I was going to read anything from that trend, I should read the one that started it all.

Plus, I just freaking love the opening line: "It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possessions of brains must be in want of more brains." Gold right there, people.

 
#9. Official Book Club Selection - Kathy Griffin

Mostly because I love Kathy Griffin's bitchy take on the world.

#8. The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks- Rebecca Sklott

The notion that this woman's cancer cells have changed the world, and that she died never knowing what her legacy would be, is amazing and terrible at the same time, which makes for the best kind of nonfiction books. And, it's getting all sorts of awards.

#7. Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang - Chelsea Handler 

I enjoy smart, sassy women who aren't afraid to be completely mean. Or slutty.

#6. Lit- Mary Karr

I haven't read Karr's other memoirs, but this one basically got a good review from pretty much everyone. While I normally disdain addiction memoirs (it's a sub-genre that I particularly find annoying), I'm assuming this one was actually positively reviewed because it's actually good, not because of it was written by a publishing insider (see: Portrait of an Addict as a Young Man).

#5. The Great Fables Crossover;- Bill Willingham, Matthew Sturges, Mark Buckingham, Russ Braun, Jose Marzen Jr. & Andrew Pepoy

The 13th installment of the Fables series in graphic novel form (it's also available monthly), The Great Fables Crossover features Fables' main cast (Snow White and her husband, Bigby - the former Good Bad Wolf from Little Red Hiding Hood - and Jack of Fables - every Jack in every fable) and pits them against the personifications of writing and story. How does that not sound amazing?

Plus, I've loved the first twelve, so I have a feeling I'll love this one, too.

#4. Towers of Midnight - Robert Jordan & Brandon Sanderson

This would be higher, but it's only been out for five days, so I'll cut myself some slack for not yet reading the penultimate book in the Wheel of Time series. I've read the whole thing (so many pages) so far, so I'm going to finish it. I'm not a quiter, after all. Plus, Sanderson has done a good job of eliminating some of Jordan's problems while keeping the author's story going.

#3. Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life - Bryan Lee O'Malley

It's true that sometimes a good movie will make you want to go out and read the book. That's what happened here, as I loved this movie so much, I saw it in the theatre twice.

#2. Naamah's Curse - Jacqueline Carey

Carey's D'Angeline alternate world history is fascinating and filled with death, mayhem, and lots and lots of great sex. This is the 8th book overall in the series, and while the second two trilogies haven't managed to capture the power of the original main character, Carey's world is still one I enjoy coming back to.

#1. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo- Stieg Larsson

Yes, I know I'm way behind with this one. But I can't be the only person out there who hasn't read it yet, right?

Right?